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I guess the reason I decided to watch this film in the first place was because it wasn’t one of those mainstream Hollywood flicks; now I understand why. The first clue into how much of a disappointment this movie was should have been the fact that Julia Stiles was in it. Not to sound completely disrespectful (10 Things I Hate About You is life), but usually an underground film with a washed up actress isn’t going to be the next greatest horror masterpiece. The trailer itself was enough to convince me to give it a go, but the movie fell short on so many levels. First of all, the movie was a little too g-rated to really excite a seasoned horror vet like myself. There was no gore at all and it seemed to just be more jumpy scenes rather than disturbing ideas and gruesome imagery. The story centers around a family that relocates to a South American town that was invaded decades ago and all the children were murdered. Said town is haunted by the tortured little souls. I didn’t really follow the story that much because it was literally that boring. It wasn’t so stupid that it made my head hurt, but bad enough that I’m only giving this one 2/5 stars. It had good cinematography, so I’ll give it that, and the acting wasn’t horrific. However, I literally could not take the movie seriously because of the fact that the little girl had an English accent even though both of her parents were American. I get it, she was born in London yadda yadda, but seriously I just found that to be a hilarious touch and I would have maybe taken the movie a bit more seriously if they wouldn’t have randomly decided the child needed to be English. From the review I’ve just written, I think it’s pretty clear that I’m obviously not recommending this movie. It has some jumpy parts here and there, but for the most part, its just too “vanilla” to really satisfy an experienced horror fan. Go ahead and recommend this to some of your newbie friends, but definitely don’t waste your precious time watching this.

Link  —  Posted: March 23, 2017 in Paranormal/ Ghost Stories

MV5BMjM2OTExMjExMV5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwODI3NjY5MDE@._V1_SY317_CR5,0,214,317_AL_This week I had the privilege/ possibly curse of watching The Treatment, a movie that was either just as fucked up as A Serbian Film, or even worse. You leave in the comments what you think.  Either way, this film left me speechless, shaking my head, and in disbelief I was able to get through the whole film without stopping and just walking away.  First off, I would like to go ahead and say that I thought this film was a masterpiece and so incredibly executed in such a raw and sick way.  The plot of this film centers around pedophilia. Pretty much I don’t want to go into detail, so I’ll just leave it up to you to determine if you want to proceed with this film or not.  This film is brutal and sick and completely lacks empathy, which is the perfect formula for any film that lies along the lines of “Serbian Film extremity”.  This Belgian film had me squirming in my seat and I’m sure my facial expressions were just as entertaining and uncomfortable as the film itself.  Some of the images are hard to sit through, as it is just a little too real at times.  It manages to tug at all the heart strings and the more it unravels, the more fucked up it gets.  I found myself saying “OMG” over and over again as the story progressed.  The film centers around Nick, who experienced the kidnapping of his brother at a young age by someone who was thought to be a pedophile, but traces of him never showed up, a suspect was never apprehended, and the case was never officially closed.  Nick grows up to become an investigator and is continually haunted by disturbing images of his brother and the unidentified kidnapper.  Shit gets real once brutal cases of child kidnapping hit his hometown and he is the lead investigator on the cases.  To give you an idea of what type of shit you’re dealing with, the perpetrator invades houses of the families, ties up the parents, and then abuses the child within the vicinity.  If stomaching this review is hard enough for you, this is only about 30% of the content in the film and pretty much all I’m willing to give away.  As fucked up and absolutely nightmarish as this film is, it will leave a deep impact on you and put the same question in your head. Is this worse then A Serbian Film, or on the same level? The acting was great and the filmography was top of the line as well.  The story was just too good and the twists and turns will take you to the limits of extremity.  Those of you that think you can handle this, proceed with caution, but don’t say I didn’t warn you……… Comments comments comments, let’s chat!

To my audience out there in Australia, or just to anyone that loves the Aussie accent or foreign cinema in MV5BMTk0NzMzODc2NF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwOTYzNTM1MzE@._V1_SY317_CR0,0,214,317_AL_general, I have compiled a small list of Aussie horrors you may have overlooked.  Make sure to add these to your list of must-see films. I’ve also provided short review and trailers so you can know anything your heart desires.  All you need to know though is that I’m a horror master and I would never steer you wrong in the horror movie recommendation area. Have you seen any of these films or not? Feel free to leave feedback in the comments, I always respond!

1.Snowtown Murders

This movie was more shocking, disturbing, and intense than actually scary.  Based on a true story, Jamie is taken under the wing of his new father-figure, who ends up being a deranged killer that brainwashes the entire family.  He leads them to do acts of unspeakable violence and its a shocking transformation that the whole family goes through.  There’s lots of bloody imagery and the story will leave you with a pit in your stomach.

2. Primal

5 backpacker go on a trip; pretty self-explanatory the type of movie you’re about to get into.  However this one takes a twist and combines the vampire/creature genre with the campy/nightmare vacation genre.  The acting is good, the effects are good, the story has more twists and turns than you would expect.  This one from down under shows Aussies why they just shouldn’t leave their own country.

3. Wolf Creek

This movie is a bit of the opposite of Primal, showing backpackers why they should travel in any other part of the world besides for the outback in Australia.  Again, this is an easy film to “genre-ize”, one of those teen/ college kidnap/survival films.  However, this one is so much more.  The gore and torture inflicted by our psychotic bogan killer is really brutal and he’s an absolute ruthless fucker.  The helpless backpackers cry out in agony and you can’t help but to watch through nearly closed eyes.  The sequel makes for a great one too, and what’s even scarier is that this was based off a true story.

4. Apocalyptic

Finally a found footage film that didn’t suck and wasn’t completely filmed on an ipad/iphone. This genre is still somewhat new and untouched (a little bit). This takes the religious/ exorcism/ possession genre and mixes it together with the newly found cult genre.  I like the cult genre, as mind control and cults are a real thing that exist in the world; there are some crazy cults out there that brainwash and can make its followers do crazy things (I’m sure we all remember how the Manson family turned out).  The cult genre truly is freaky, and to an extent, the effects of found footage always get to me as well.

5. The Loved Ones

Originally, the Harry Styles lookalike is what drew me to the film.  I must profess my love for this doppelganger and how heartbroken I was to see him tortured so ruthlessly.  Again, this film can fall quite easily into a genre which may be a problem for some horror viewers as its nothing mind-fucking and truly chilling.  However, i gotta give it credit, this movie is pretty damn good.  All the characters are likable, the plot is pretty original, so I guess not really your typical prom horror, and the gore and blood is pretty full on.  This my be my favorite of the bunch.

6. The Babadook

Easily considered a modern horror classic (by others not by me), I was actually disappointed by this film, but couldn’t help putting it on the list. This got quite a lot of attention at Sundance and pretty much every person but me has had something good to say about this film.  Maybe I wasn’t in the right mood to be watching a horror whenever I chose to watch this film, but I’m not really willing to give it another go and give it a higher rating.  Hopefully many of you have seen this since this was such a big hit out on the horror market and you can beg to differ with my opinion, but I just thought most of the movie was hype and build up. However, as unconvincing and cynical as this mini review was, I would still say check out this movie and see it for yourself.

p9257928_b_v7_aiI was beginning to get a little bored with all the movie reviews, so I decided to change it up and do a TV show review instead.  Instead of critiquing each season of my newly found favorite show, I thought I would just lump it up into one big review for you to digest so you can decide if this show is right for you or not.  I’m not that much of a horror TV show fan because I have rarely found any out there that have really piqued my interest. The Walking Dead? I was so bored I don’t think I even made it to the second season. American Horror Story? 2 seasons contained enough butchering and everything after that has just managed to butcher itself. Bates Motel? 1 episode and I was convinced the show just wasn’t for me.  The only horror TV that had me addicted from the start was Dexter, and we all saw how that one ended. 6 seasons of bliss and 2 seasons of just dragging me along through the commitment that I had already made.  Regardless, Dexter is still my favorite horror TV show out there.  Recently though, The Following, starring Kevin Bacon, made it onto my radar, and before I knew it, I had started and finished 3 seasons.  Coming from Fox, I had low expectations of how this show would be, but boy was I wrong. Where to even begin with this show…….??? So good I would compare it to Dexter.  The basis of the series is that Keven Bacon plays Ryan Hardy, a detective (or FBI, whatever you prefer to call it) that has been hunting a serial killer, Joe Carroll (James Purefoy).  Carroll, even from behind bars, has managed to put together a cult of serial killers that just continue to grow and grow.  They randomly choose victims and there seems to be drama and crazy situations at the end of each episode, which is obviously what lead me to finish 3 seasons of this in just about a couple weeks. Overall, this is the most badass series I’ve seen since Dexter.  Deaths in every episode, blood in every scene, everything completely shrouded in mystery that just keeps you coming back like a crack pipe; this show is everything for a horror movie fiend.  Now, if you’re expecting any true horror or scares……. don’t; because that is definitely not happening.  Instead, what is happening is completely unpredictable, mysterious, un-stereotypical characters and scenarios that truly take you on a wild and addicting ride.  Kevin Williamson, the creator, adds so many interesting and unusual characters and scenarios that I just couldn’t help but be impressed with the originality and complexity of everything which obviously led to my addiction to the show.  I will admit, season 3 gets a little corny with all the characters just acting like typical FBI agents and not taking as many twists and turns as I would like, but overall, all the seasons are incredible.  I really felt sucked into the show from start to finish in each episode, which I find to be extremely rare nowadays. I wouldn’t classify this show as gory, or scary, or perverse, or twisted even; but its a damn good show with lots of great twists and turns.  I guess I don’t know if I can even classify it as horror, but it definitely puts an awesome spin on the whole psychological thriller/ serial killer genre.  I would recommend everyone check this show out, great thriller / borderline horror. If you’ve already seen this show, what do you think about the ending? Answer in the comments, would love to hear your guys’ thoughts.

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At this moment in time, I’m not sure what’s making me more excited; the fact that I know that I am going to re-watch The Canal once I’m done writing this review or imparting my wisdom of this newly found gem of a horror for you to discover.  The Canal has definitely got to be one of the best horrors I’ve seen this year, and totally unexpected as well.  David is a man who, unbeknownst to him, is descending into madness as he discovers his wife is having an affair.  His wife disappears and he immediately begins suspecting his own house of possessing powers strong enough to take her away from him and his son.  When he is found not to be a suspect during the police investigation, things take a turn for the scary, weird, and disturbing.  Can I just say, this is the first time I have found myself feeling scared while watching a film in years?  This film will genuinely scare the shit out of you.  On top of that, its so cleverly put together and such a mind fuck that I just loved it and can’t recommend it enough.  There wasn’t much gore and there was nothing perversely disturbing about the film, but I just loved how unique and actually scary it was.  I had to give this one 4.5/ 5 stars.  I would give this one 5/5 stars, but there was just nothing too fucked up or over the top about it. Any film that I’ve given 5 stars to is usually some necrophilia gore splattering blood fuckfest, to put it lightly; but this film was so tame with how controversial it was that I would actually say there was nothing controversial about it. 5-star films always have that controversial factor to it, but this one just lacked it.  However, I would say the ending was a total disturbing mindfuck.  I think regardless of your taste in horror, everyone needs to check out this film. From the second you tune in, the movie just keeps getting better and better, which I find doesn’t happen in films much these days. Sometimes the plot loses you, sometimes you wish you could skip through a part; but in this movie, I wanted to watch every single second of it, even when I had my hands over my eyes because I was so scared.  I’m telling you, this movie is just amazing.  I hope you guys find this movie as awesome and highly rated as I did, please let me know your opinions in the comments!

Rob Zombie movies for beginners

Posted: August 9, 2015 in Top 5 Lists

Rob Zombie has to be among my absolute favorite horror directors.  I can honestly say I have loved almost everything he has made. Below is my take on Rob Zombie’s films.  Although I have to say all his films are incredible, I have ranked them from best to worst. Here it goes:

House of 1000 Corpses

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I think this was the first Rob Zombie film I saw and I was instantly hooked on his brand of horror; sadistic psychotic killers that end up to be some crazy family picking off teen’s one by one and making them suffer through unimaginable horror.  The characters are so lovable and just badass; you actually get to know, appreciate, and like the characters, which I feel most other horror movies fail at doing. Everything is just nuts and blew my mind. Highly recommend, don’t miss this one

Devil’s Rejects

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It was hard choosing between this one and House of 1000 Corpses for first and second place, just to give you an idea of how much I adore this film as well.

Halloween & Halloween 2

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I’m not really a fan of remakes, so I can say that I don’t 100% recommend these (like 80%) just because Halloween has been done and redone a thousand times over again.  Its hard for me to appreciate Rob’s approach in the films just because I’ve seen the original and sequels too many damn times! However, I can appreciate the blood and gore that he put into these. Nothing really that new, but the acting is so good and its just really violent. Check it out if you want to see an upgrade in quality and gore (but not better than the original).

Lords of Salem

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Eh, I didn’t really care for this one.  The message of the film was good, and it was excellently executed with lots of stunning and terrifying visuals and scenes, but just wasn’t scary enough.  There was zero gore in this film, which shocked me coming from Rob.  I feel like he’s none for his gory film style and this just didn’t cut it for me.  It was a nice change from his usual stuff, and Sheri absolutely kills it with her acting skills; I just love her. Wouldn’t recommend this one.

Werewolf Women of the SS

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This movie made me feel like I was on drugs.  It honestly felt like one hallucinogenic trip that just didn’t seem like it was going to end

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Did you see the trailer for this film? Did you guys see it?  Didn’t it look so fricken badass and scary? Yeah………… That’s about as good as this movie gets, sorry guys.  I’m sorry to burst your “little bit of excitement” bubble the trailer just helped form in your head, but this movie is complete and utter, found footage bullshit. The trailer itself was much scarier than the film, and what a shame that 90 minutes was………

My initial reaction to the trailer was, “Wow, the old lady is so creepy, plus the twist with found footage and sleep walking? This movie is gonna be scary as hell!”.  20 minutes later, I manage to find a copy of the film online and delve straight into it, as the trailer had me convinced I would finally find an actual scare in a horror.  I have to admit, the director (Zachary Donohue) did think of some brilliant concepts.  Preying on an actual human degenerative disorder, Donohue attempted to make dementia look absolutely terrifying.  He failed. Literally, on every level. Some of the bits here and there were creepy.  But overall, the film was  typical, predictable, and similar to all the other found footage paranormal films, just with a new twist that didn’t play out as planned.

The storyline is actually quite typical. A student in university, studying something or other (didn’t really care to pay attention), decides to film a documentary on the degeneration of Deborah Logan as dementia sets in and slowly envelopes her into madness, and the strain it puts on the relationship between her and her caregiver daughter.  At first, I liked this idea.  Old people are creepy enough as it is (sorry Grandma), but featuring them mentally decaying through a found footage film just seemed scary on another level.  It definitely helps that Deborah, played by Jill Larson, is extremely frail and decrepit and quite frightening in appearance.  Anyways, she manages to completely submit to dementia and the results are not as scary as I expected from the trailers.  To be honest, I thought most of the scenes were just completely ridiculous and stupid.  I actually found more humor in the the stupidity of the “scary scenes” than I did actual scares.  The taping of the “found footage” wouldn’t be complete without an incompetent camera crew that couldn’t seem to stay out of trouble’s way.  This movie contained every paranormal found footage cliche in the book, which is mainly why I couldn’t take the film seriously. I thought the storyline was dumb as well and overall disappointing.  I barely was able to give this one 2.5/5 stars.  I think its safe for me to say, you can skip this film and take those extra 90 minutes to do something useful with your time (another horror movie, perhaps?).  This movie is not getting a recommendation from me. Anybody beg to differ? Leave your comments below, would love to hear what some of you have to say about this film. Cheers! x