p9257928_b_v7_aiI was beginning to get a little bored with all the movie reviews, so I decided to change it up and do a TV show review instead.  Instead of critiquing each season of my newly found favorite show, I thought I would just lump it up into one big review for you to digest so you can decide if this show is right for you or not.  I’m not that much of a horror TV show fan because I have rarely found any out there that have really piqued my interest. The Walking Dead? I was so bored I don’t think I even made it to the second season. American Horror Story? 2 seasons contained enough butchering and everything after that has just managed to butcher itself. Bates Motel? 1 episode and I was convinced the show just wasn’t for me.  The only horror TV that had me addicted from the start was Dexter, and we all saw how that one ended. 6 seasons of bliss and 2 seasons of just dragging me along through the commitment that I had already made.  Regardless, Dexter is still my favorite horror TV show out there.  Recently though, The Following, starring Kevin Bacon, made it onto my radar, and before I knew it, I had started and finished 3 seasons.  Coming from Fox, I had low expectations of how this show would be, but boy was I wrong. Where to even begin with this show…….??? So good I would compare it to Dexter.  The basis of the series is that Keven Bacon plays Ryan Hardy, a detective (or FBI, whatever you prefer to call it) that has been hunting a serial killer, Joe Carroll (James Purefoy).  Carroll, even from behind bars, has managed to put together a cult of serial killers that just continue to grow and grow.  They randomly choose victims and there seems to be drama and crazy situations at the end of each episode, which is obviously what lead me to finish 3 seasons of this in just about a couple weeks. Overall, this is the most badass series I’ve seen since Dexter.  Deaths in every episode, blood in every scene, everything completely shrouded in mystery that just keeps you coming back like a crack pipe; this show is everything for a horror movie fiend.  Now, if you’re expecting any true horror or scares……. don’t; because that is definitely not happening.  Instead, what is happening is completely unpredictable, mysterious, un-stereotypical characters and scenarios that truly take you on a wild and addicting ride.  Kevin Williamson, the creator, adds so many interesting and unusual characters and scenarios that I just couldn’t help but be impressed with the originality and complexity of everything which obviously led to my addiction to the show.  I will admit, season 3 gets a little corny with all the characters just acting like typical FBI agents and not taking as many twists and turns as I would like, but overall, all the seasons are incredible.  I really felt sucked into the show from start to finish in each episode, which I find to be extremely rare nowadays. I wouldn’t classify this show as gory, or scary, or perverse, or twisted even; but its a damn good show with lots of great twists and turns.  I guess I don’t know if I can even classify it as horror, but it definitely puts an awesome spin on the whole psychological thriller/ serial killer genre.  I would recommend everyone check this show out, great thriller / borderline horror. If you’ve already seen this show, what do you think about the ending? Answer in the comments, would love to hear your guys’ thoughts.


At this moment in time, I’m not sure what’s making me more excited; the fact that I know that I am going to re-watch The Canal once I’m done writing this review or imparting my wisdom of this newly found gem of a horror for you to discover.  The Canal has definitely got to be one of the best horrors I’ve seen this year, and totally unexpected as well.  David is a man who, unbeknownst to him, is descending into madness as he discovers his wife is having an affair.  His wife disappears and he immediately begins suspecting his own house of possessing powers strong enough to take her away from him and his son.  When he is found not to be a suspect during the police investigation, things take a turn for the scary, weird, and disturbing.  Can I just say, this is the first time I have found myself feeling scared while watching a film in years?  This film will genuinely scare the shit out of you.  On top of that, its so cleverly put together and such a mind fuck that I just loved it and can’t recommend it enough.  There wasn’t much gore and there was nothing perversely disturbing about the film, but I just loved how unique and actually scary it was.  I had to give this one 4.5/ 5 stars.  I would give this one 5/5 stars, but there was just nothing too fucked up or over the top about it. Any film that I’ve given 5 stars to is usually some necrophilia gore splattering blood fuckfest, to put it lightly; but this film was so tame with how controversial it was that I would actually say there was nothing controversial about it. 5-star films always have that controversial factor to it, but this one just lacked it.  However, I would say the ending was a total disturbing mindfuck.  I think regardless of your taste in horror, everyone needs to check out this film. From the second you tune in, the movie just keeps getting better and better, which I find doesn’t happen in films much these days. Sometimes the plot loses you, sometimes you wish you could skip through a part; but in this movie, I wanted to watch every single second of it, even when I had my hands over my eyes because I was so scared.  I’m telling you, this movie is just amazing.  I hope you guys find this movie as awesome and highly rated as I did, please let me know your opinions in the comments!

Rob Zombie movies for beginners

Posted: August 9, 2015 in Top 5 Lists

Rob Zombie has to be among my absolute favorite horror directors.  I can honestly say I have loved almost everything he has made. Below is my take on Rob Zombie’s films.  Although I have to say all his films are incredible, I have ranked them from best to worst. Here it goes:

House of 1000 Corpses


I think this was the first Rob Zombie film I saw and I was instantly hooked on his brand of horror; sadistic psychotic killers that end up to be some crazy family picking off teen’s one by one and making them suffer through unimaginable horror.  The characters are so lovable and just badass; you actually get to know, appreciate, and like the characters, which I feel most other horror movies fail at doing. Everything is just nuts and blew my mind. Highly recommend, don’t miss this one

Devil’s Rejects


It was hard choosing between this one and House of 1000 Corpses for first and second place, just to give you an idea of how much I adore this film as well.

Halloween & Halloween 2

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I’m not really a fan of remakes, so I can say that I don’t 100% recommend these (like 80%) just because Halloween has been done and redone a thousand times over again.  Its hard for me to appreciate Rob’s approach in the films just because I’ve seen the original and sequels too many damn times! However, I can appreciate the blood and gore that he put into these. Nothing really that new, but the acting is so good and its just really violent. Check it out if you want to see an upgrade in quality and gore (but not better than the original).

Lords of Salem

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Eh, I didn’t really care for this one.  The message of the film was good, and it was excellently executed with lots of stunning and terrifying visuals and scenes, but just wasn’t scary enough.  There was zero gore in this film, which shocked me coming from Rob.  I feel like he’s none for his gory film style and this just didn’t cut it for me.  It was a nice change from his usual stuff, and Sheri absolutely kills it with her acting skills; I just love her. Wouldn’t recommend this one.

Werewolf Women of the SS


This movie made me feel like I was on drugs.  It honestly felt like one hallucinogenic trip that just didn’t seem like it was going to end


Did you see the trailer for this film? Did you guys see it?  Didn’t it look so fricken badass and scary? Yeah………… That’s about as good as this movie gets, sorry guys.  I’m sorry to burst your “little bit of excitement” bubble the trailer just helped form in your head, but this movie is complete and utter, found footage bullshit. The trailer itself was much scarier than the film, and what a shame that 90 minutes was………

My initial reaction to the trailer was, “Wow, the old lady is so creepy, plus the twist with found footage and sleep walking? This movie is gonna be scary as hell!”.  20 minutes later, I manage to find a copy of the film online and delve straight into it, as the trailer had me convinced I would finally find an actual scare in a horror.  I have to admit, the director (Zachary Donohue) did think of some brilliant concepts.  Preying on an actual human degenerative disorder, Donohue attempted to make dementia look absolutely terrifying.  He failed. Literally, on every level. Some of the bits here and there were creepy.  But overall, the film was  typical, predictable, and similar to all the other found footage paranormal films, just with a new twist that didn’t play out as planned.

The storyline is actually quite typical. A student in university, studying something or other (didn’t really care to pay attention), decides to film a documentary on the degeneration of Deborah Logan as dementia sets in and slowly envelopes her into madness, and the strain it puts on the relationship between her and her caregiver daughter.  At first, I liked this idea.  Old people are creepy enough as it is (sorry Grandma), but featuring them mentally decaying through a found footage film just seemed scary on another level.  It definitely helps that Deborah, played by Jill Larson, is extremely frail and decrepit and quite frightening in appearance.  Anyways, she manages to completely submit to dementia and the results are not as scary as I expected from the trailers.  To be honest, I thought most of the scenes were just completely ridiculous and stupid.  I actually found more humor in the the stupidity of the “scary scenes” than I did actual scares.  The taping of the “found footage” wouldn’t be complete without an incompetent camera crew that couldn’t seem to stay out of trouble’s way.  This movie contained every paranormal found footage cliche in the book, which is mainly why I couldn’t take the film seriously. I thought the storyline was dumb as well and overall disappointing.  I barely was able to give this one 2.5/5 stars.  I think its safe for me to say, you can skip this film and take those extra 90 minutes to do something useful with your time (another horror movie, perhaps?).  This movie is not getting a recommendation from me. Anybody beg to differ? Leave your comments below, would love to hear what some of you have to say about this film. Cheers! x

Do you ever feel like you just can’t seem to have enough blood and gore in your films?  Do you often find that you are NOT spending the majority of your horror movie watching time cringing and looking away? Fear no more horror fiends and friends alike.  I have compiled a list of absolute NASTIES.  I myself, found I had to look away more times then I would like to admit with these movies.


Where to begin with this movie? Just overall FUCKED. Such a disturbing, psychotic, extreme movie. Lots of blood and merciless brutality on the end of the serial killer.  This one definitely hits you from all angles; messes with your mind, pulls at your heartstrings, puts a pit in your stomach, is disgusting to watch, and even grosser to think about.  Lots of scenes really made my heart beat fast with just how shockingly gross they were.  I would recommend skipping the first 5-7 minutes of the film.  Its seriously just unpleasant nastiness and seems to take away from the film rather than add to it. Please be warned though, this movie does contain some (fake) animal gore.

Cannibal Holocaust

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You’ve got to give this film credit, it was WAY ahead of its time in the horror movie world.  The idea of your plane crashing into the remote part of a jungle with only a cannibalistic tribe as “companions” is terrifying. Fast forward, and there you are deep in the jungles of South America being hunted and captured in order to be fed to this savage tribe.  The movie looks so real, which is what is the most disturbing. The acting is good and the effects are extremely practical, making it pretty believable.   Again, this film also contains animal gore (apparently real), you’ve been warned!

Dead Alive (AKA Braindead)

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This film is a great laugh and not to be taken seriously.  However, that doesn’t take away from just how bloody disgusting it is! This film is as funny as it is gross.  The story line is great and the creative ways in which the characters are murdered and dismembered are just hilarious.  Great mix of humor, guts, and horror.

Human Centipede 2

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Just thinking about this film gives me a bad taste in my mouth.  What a pile of garbage.  At the same time though, if you want to challenge yourself and push your limits of what you think is grotesque, give this one a try.  Such a gross out film, that seemed to be its main purpose.  If you can watch this entire movie without looking away once, congratulations, you have officially “out-gored” me.



Rather than go into detail with what this film is about, I figure I’d just have you do the research yourself.  It saves me from one AWKWARD movie review. I will say this though, this has to be one of the most extreme horrors I have ever seen, not for the weak of heart or stomach. Cannibalism is present, which is actually the least offensive thing I found about this movie. Once the pornographic scenes started, things got weird. To say the least. I found myself closing my eyes, plugging my ears, and wishing I was in a different place for about 70% of that film.  That’s a new record, folks. Lots of blood, among other things to see here.


This movie………………. How can I convince you to watch this movie?……… 3/5 stars; is that enough to sell you? The film comes straight out of New Zealand, and the audience gets the privilege of hearing that beautiful Kiwi accent that I just love so much, now you interested? What if I told you the film took an unusual detour from your normal horror and added a few cheeky elements that actually made me end the film with all the good feels. Now do I have your attention? In its own way, this one is a bit of a cheeky, subtly hidden comedic horror.  The film starts out boring and stupid as all hell, I must admit.  The first 30-45 minutes were completely USELESS, you could actually skip the beginning if you really wanted to.  The director did an absolutely terrible job at laying the foundation for the film.  In the beginning, I found that the characters were quite bland, horrible acting, and just too boring for me to care about.  Enter into the 45-minute mark, and the film slowly starts building.  The movie is about a woman who can’t stop committing crimes and as a result is forced into house arrest in her childhood him with her ever-so-lucky mom and dad.  If you can take my word for how good this film is, please just accept that the first half of the film is a disaster and it gets better. Anyways, as said criminal is on house arrest, she hears lots of weird sounds coming from around the house and immediately suspects a ghost.  Upon exploration, she discovers that her childhood home was once a psych ward for insane and psychotic youth; and grisly murder once took place here, causing the mental institution to be shut down and then resold as a house.  Upon finding this information, she launches her own investigation into the murder of the patient many years ago and begins to uncover some secrets about the house, as well as some of the people in her small town.  At this point in the movie, I can honestly say it stops getting corny and starts getting real.  The flow and suspense-building are pretty on point.  Enter cheeky Kiwi humor and this film is suddenly quite a delight.  The only thing I can compare this to, is sitting on a roller coaster, getting strapped in, and getting propelled forward, only knowing that its going to be one exciting, fun ride from here on out. That’s pretty much how I felt.  The director did a great job at incorporating gore, suspense, humor, and intelligence all at the same time.  Only downfall is that these elements are only present in the second half of the movie, hence why I gave it only 3/5 stars.  If you can deal with my rating, then I would definitely go ahead and recommend this film.  The ending is pretty awesome and really throws your for one, as its as gory as it is funny and cheeky. I love Kiwi culture and their sense of humor.  This movie is a perfect example of what happens when this is successfully combined with an above average horror (again, I suck at selling films that are 3.5 stars or less).  Even though the horror wasn’t the best, I would say definitely check this film out, you’ll get a kick out of it. Let me know your thoughts on this one in the comments, thanks for reading this week’s horror review, hope everyone enjoyed!

Mine Games

Posted: May 19, 2015 in Serial Killers

mine games

If you’re in the mood for “5 teens head into a remote cabin the woods” type of film, then this could potentially be your film.  Although I only gave the film a measly 2.5/5 stars, it may still be worth a watch if you like this specific sub-genre of horror.  This teen slasher comes pretty standard; characters with little to no personality, drugs, sex, alcohol, bad choices, and of course, murder.  However, this movie is a bit more than just a slasher; in a surprise twist of events, the film turns out to have some supernatural elements included in it as well.  Not exactly a ghost story, but a paranormal film.  At the beginning/middle of the film, it became extremely obvious who the killer was, which made me almost want to switch off the film.  However, enjoying myself on a rare 48-hour weekend, I couldn’t be asked to switch off the film and then start browsing for something else.  I attribute my completion of the film to sheer laziness.  In the end though, I was glad I watched the movie all the way through.  The gore was way below standard and I barely felt any element of surprise.  I wouldn’t even go as far as to say the film was scary.  Luckily, the director seemed to come up with at least a decent idea of how to make this shit movie a bit less shit: have it take place in a creepy mine.  I have to admit, the scenery of the mind was grim.  The only time the movie was eery and had a horror feel to it was during the mine scenes.  Unfortunately, that makes up only about 20% of the movie; so if you can handle a movie that’s 80% bore no gore, then this could possibly be a film for you.  I’m not exactly selling anybody on this, am I? Basically, I only watched this movie because I was in the mood to see a bunch of moronic teens get picked off one by one.  I didn’t have high expectations for the movie, so my substandard expectations were met.  There was a cool surprise twist at the end which is what even made me consider writing this movie review in the first place.  I can’t actually go ahead and recommend this one right off the bat, but like I said, if you’re in the mood for a teen slasher, this one is definitely not your average one.  How do you think this one rates amongst other teen slashers? Leave your answers in the comments!